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How to support a Celiac (whether they are a child or an adult)
T
Supporters need to be aware of the way they talk about CD when the child is around. No one should be talking
with pity in their voice around the child, or challenging parents about the diet in front of the child, saying “you poor
thing” and comments like that. Supporters are encouraged to go out and try to find new and tasty G-F treats for the
child, and present the foods themselves. Nothing says “I love you” or “I care about you” to a Celiac child than when
they see other people making or buying G-F foods for them or buying them fun things to eat.
Recipes
When trying new G-F recipes, supporters should go over recipe ingredients with parents beforehand, so parents
can doublecheck ingredients. Parents will be moved that you are making the effort for their child. The reason it is
important to check ingredients beforehand, is because a parent cannot allow a Celiac child to eat anything
questionable. The smallest amount of gluten can cause internal damage to Celiacs, even if you can’t tell on the
outside. It is extremely uncomfortable for a parent of a Celiac to have to turn down a specially prepared food that
was intended to be gluten-free, but which cannot be verified as such.
Your child's friends
Parents might want to call or send a letter explaining CD to their child’s closest friends’ parents. They should
make sure other parents know that they are ready, willing and able to send gluten-free foods to parties and
playdates.
Parents: when friends are at your house for playdates, you can explain why there are separate toasters,
spreadable condiments and other things in your kitchen. When it is snacktime you can show them foods that are
gluten-free and talk about those which are not. This will give kids a better understanding of what your child can
and can’t eat. Above all, make it a FUN lesson and keep it light. Your child will probably be right there listening, so
make sure there is no pity in your voice or any negative talk. Always think about how you will explain things before
you actually do, so that your words and demeanor come off right.
Negative reactions from people
It may be harder than parents think to get relatives and friends to understand the seriousness of the gluten-free
diet. There are people who will tell parents (or make them feel like) they’re overreacting or exaggerating.
Especially if their child is a “Silent Celiac” or one who never had any major outward symptoms. Some people think
that with this type of child, since you can’t see a reaction to gluten (like you do with an anaphylactic reaction to a
food allergy) that it’s not for real. Unfortunately a little bit of gluten can hurt a lot, whether you see a bodily reaction
or not. Supporters: please keep in mind that a parent only has their child’s best interest and health in mind. They
really are not trying to make life more difficult than it is.
In regards to Morgan, I’ve had people say things like “can’t she even have just one cookie?” or “can’t you just
scrape the breading off this chicken nugget?” or “can’t you just peel the cheese off this pizza and let her eat it?” or
“she seems healthy to me....just let her try this one donut...she’ll love it.”
Older generations may have never heard of gluten before and might have a hard time accepting Celiac disease as
reality, so it may be discouraging to hear or see their reactions. Parents: do your best to show them that it's for real.
If there are friends or family that don’t “buy it” from a parent, they should:
-Read printed information, brochures, books and articles about Celiac
-Review statistics that show that Celiacs have increased risk of developing diseases such as diabetes and
cancer.
-Realize that when celiac children consume gluten they compromise their chances of full growth and healthy
development physically and intellectually.
-If they have a computer, visit helpful websites, like www.childrenshospital.org/celiacinfo or www.celiac.com.
If parents find themselves feeling annoyed with these types of people, it is important not to show it in front of the
Celiac child. Conflicting parties should make it a priority to discuss situations without the child around. You don’t
want to make the child feel like he or she is the cause of any friction or trouble between people.
There will also be people who act like they understand, but they really don’t. And who would, right off the bat? It
took me months to fully understand how the G-F diet worked. Parents: It is helpful to give people a list of gluten
ingredients, so they see that there are many more things they need to watch out for than just the word “wheat”.
Supporters: please ask parents for such a list. It will show how much you care.
There will be people who act panic striken when parents tell them their child has CD. They freak out at just the
thought of ever giving the child anything to eat ever again. Please make sure the child doesn’t see this type of
reaction. Since parents never know what to expect from someone, they should always make sure they tell people
about their child’s diagnosis in private, so the child doesn’t see any bad reactions.
I remember one year we were at our local Celiac walk taking a picture of everyone who came to support Morgan. A
couple came by and was watching and asked who Morgan was (her name was on this sign we were holding) and
we introduced them to her and the guy said something like “Poor little thing. What a shame that she has such an
awful disease.” Morgan was right there, so I said both confidently and politely, something like “There’s nothing to
feel sorry about. She is perfectly healthy and is lucky to know she has Celiac disease so she can eat the right
things and live a healthy life.”
There will be times when a parent is absolutely shocked by the insensitive things some people will say, right in
front of the Celiac child. Parents should be ready with a positive remark that will let people know that they feel the
opposite. Even if someone might agree inside, never let the child know that. Parents should talk to that person
afterwards, in private and explain to them why they don’t want their child hearing anything negative about CD. Even
thought it’s uncomfortable for everyone, have the conversations any way. The child is worth it. Parents should let
everyone in their life know that they want to keep things positive for the sake of the child. He or she will be on this
diet for the rest of his or her life, and parents need to start the child off on the right foot with everyone around
showing full support.
Positive people
Not everyone has a bad reaction though. Thankfully there are still sensitive and courteous people out there who
sense the need for positive talk and who see the importance of the diet. Sometimes parents will find people who
actually get it and want to understand it fully. They listen to the parent’s explanation and ask thoughtful questions.
Sometimes supporters who get the diet will call me with a food item to verify that it’s okay for my child to eat. I’ve
had a few Moms call me up and ask if certain things are G-F because they want to include everyone in the class
with the birthday treat they are bringing in. Parents: thank those supporters profusely for their kindness. Those
thoughtful people have brought tears to my eyes on more than a few occasions.
Examples of ways people have been, and still are, supporters in our lives:
• when I was first diagnosed in 2007, my Mom, siblings and their spouses all pitched in and got me a huge
surprise gift basket of G-F food items that they had all shopped for at Christmas.
• a group of women friends from church got together and also surprised me with a gift basket of G-F goodies
after diagnosis.
• my younger sister makes G-F sugar cookies every so often and invites my daughters over to frost and decorate
them for different holidays, and also keeps freezie pops and G-F treats at her house for Morgan.
• my older sister sometimes mails me G-F power bars and other G-F items she finds down south
• my sister-in-law makes chicken souvlaki as her meal for family parties instead of pizza, uses G-F pie crusts and
tries to make sure there is plenty for us to eat
• my mom makes us G-F meatballs and spaghetti on occasion. She keeps G-F crackers and snacks at her
house and makes sure she only gives us G-F candy. She makes G-F pie crusts for us, makes us special gravy
and tries to keep G-F rolls in the freezer to make garlic bread on occasion.
• my mother-in-law makes us this incredible stuffing for holiday meals, and G-F dips that we can all enjoy. She
makes sure there is a G-F cake or something for dessert, tries new recipes and keeps G-F snacks at her house
for sleepovers.
• my dad invites us over for G-F pancakes sometimes, and shows us how he uses a separate griddle, spatula,
etc. so we don't need to worry about cross-contamination. He surprises our girls by buying G-F treats like
Cheetos, Peeps, corn chips, etc.
• my elderly neighbor goes to a nearby specialty store and buys us G-F products to try a few times a year. She is
the one who introduced us to our favorite Chebe mixes.
• A thoughtful friend of mine always makes sure she brings something G-F for me whenever we meet up with
women from church at different get-togethers. She brings chocolate covered strawberries, has bought me
packages of G-F crackers to have with cheese, a box of Pamela’s lemon cookies, etc.
• A few friends from church pass on G-F recipes whenever they come across them in e-newsletters or in
magazines.
• A parent I met during my daughters’ preschool (who has since become a friend) made an incredible G-F cake
for the preschool’s graduation party, and has since made us G-F candied nuts and other treats. When she has a
party for her daughter, she lets us know that she has made G-F cupcakes so Morgan can have the same thing as
everyone else.
• A few moms have called to see what snack they can bring that is G-F for Morgan’s class
• My mother and mother-in-law (and sometimes other relatives) will make gluten-free cakes or cupcakes for us to
have at family parties. Or they always make sure there is ice cream and other frozen treats on hand.
• My husband’s grandma figured out how to make her cheesy potatoes without using soup or crushed cereal on
top, so that we may eat it too.
What parents can do:
Just as parents have a learning curve in understanding the gluten free diet, so will others. Parents should gently
reinforce the types of foods that are safe for their child. It is valuable to make copies of helpful material and provide
them to anyone who has the Celiac child in their care. Parents: always send some sort of gluten-free snack. If they
visit Grandma often, buy a box of Panda Puffs or other G-F cereal, a box of NutThin crackers, Cheetos, etc. and
keep them in her pantry for your child to enjoy when she visits. Print out a list of G-F snacks and tape it on the
inside of a cupboard door for Grandma to reference. Try not to have your child stay with anyone that belittles the
importance of your child staying on a strict gluten free diet, until they begin to understand the importance of
supporting your child’s health.
Parents should:
-Explain to supporters what they are going through, and let them know what they can do to help you.
-Start discussions with supporters about the importance for special food preparations.
-Never assume that a supporter knows what they are talking about when it comes to offending ingredients. Always
verify. (But also make sure you let them know that you really appreciate the efforts they are making and explain
your need to verify ingredients.)
Supporters: You can let the Celiac child and his/her family know how much you care by being positive (not
dismissive) about the gluten-free diet, by researching Celiac disease and its effects, by not treating the child as if
he/she is “sick”, by passing on to parents any helpful information you might find along the way, by splurging on a
G-F food that you just discovered for the child, by going over a recipe you want to try to make with the child’s parent,
by supporting them in a local walk or run, and just letting them know you are there if they need an ear or any other
help. Even by just letting them know you read this web page and that you are there for them as a supporter....it will
mean a lot to them.
with pity in their voice around the child, or challenging parents about the diet in front of the child, saying “you poor
thing” and comments like that. Supporters are encouraged to go out and try to find new and tasty G-F treats for the
child, and present the foods themselves. Nothing says “I love you” or “I care about you” to a Celiac child than when
they see other people making or buying G-F foods for them or buying them fun things to eat.
Recipes
When trying new G-F recipes, supporters should go over recipe ingredients with parents beforehand, so parents
can doublecheck ingredients. Parents will be moved that you are making the effort for their child. The reason it is
important to check ingredients beforehand, is because a parent cannot allow a Celiac child to eat anything
questionable. The smallest amount of gluten can cause internal damage to Celiacs, even if you can’t tell on the
outside. It is extremely uncomfortable for a parent of a Celiac to have to turn down a specially prepared food that
was intended to be gluten-free, but which cannot be verified as such.
Your child's friends
Parents might want to call or send a letter explaining CD to their child’s closest friends’ parents. They should
make sure other parents know that they are ready, willing and able to send gluten-free foods to parties and
playdates.
Parents: when friends are at your house for playdates, you can explain why there are separate toasters,
spreadable condiments and other things in your kitchen. When it is snacktime you can show them foods that are
gluten-free and talk about those which are not. This will give kids a better understanding of what your child can
and can’t eat. Above all, make it a FUN lesson and keep it light. Your child will probably be right there listening, so
make sure there is no pity in your voice or any negative talk. Always think about how you will explain things before
you actually do, so that your words and demeanor come off right.
Negative reactions from people
It may be harder than parents think to get relatives and friends to understand the seriousness of the gluten-free
diet. There are people who will tell parents (or make them feel like) they’re overreacting or exaggerating.
Especially if their child is a “Silent Celiac” or one who never had any major outward symptoms. Some people think
that with this type of child, since you can’t see a reaction to gluten (like you do with an anaphylactic reaction to a
food allergy) that it’s not for real. Unfortunately a little bit of gluten can hurt a lot, whether you see a bodily reaction
or not. Supporters: please keep in mind that a parent only has their child’s best interest and health in mind. They
really are not trying to make life more difficult than it is.
In regards to Morgan, I’ve had people say things like “can’t she even have just one cookie?” or “can’t you just
scrape the breading off this chicken nugget?” or “can’t you just peel the cheese off this pizza and let her eat it?” or
“she seems healthy to me....just let her try this one donut...she’ll love it.”
Older generations may have never heard of gluten before and might have a hard time accepting Celiac disease as
reality, so it may be discouraging to hear or see their reactions. Parents: do your best to show them that it's for real.
If there are friends or family that don’t “buy it” from a parent, they should:
-Read printed information, brochures, books and articles about Celiac
-Review statistics that show that Celiacs have increased risk of developing diseases such as diabetes and
cancer.
-Realize that when celiac children consume gluten they compromise their chances of full growth and healthy
development physically and intellectually.
-If they have a computer, visit helpful websites, like www.childrenshospital.org/celiacinfo or www.celiac.com.
If parents find themselves feeling annoyed with these types of people, it is important not to show it in front of the
Celiac child. Conflicting parties should make it a priority to discuss situations without the child around. You don’t
want to make the child feel like he or she is the cause of any friction or trouble between people.
There will also be people who act like they understand, but they really don’t. And who would, right off the bat? It
took me months to fully understand how the G-F diet worked. Parents: It is helpful to give people a list of gluten
ingredients, so they see that there are many more things they need to watch out for than just the word “wheat”.
Supporters: please ask parents for such a list. It will show how much you care.
There will be people who act panic striken when parents tell them their child has CD. They freak out at just the
thought of ever giving the child anything to eat ever again. Please make sure the child doesn’t see this type of
reaction. Since parents never know what to expect from someone, they should always make sure they tell people
about their child’s diagnosis in private, so the child doesn’t see any bad reactions.
I remember one year we were at our local Celiac walk taking a picture of everyone who came to support Morgan. A
couple came by and was watching and asked who Morgan was (her name was on this sign we were holding) and
we introduced them to her and the guy said something like “Poor little thing. What a shame that she has such an
awful disease.” Morgan was right there, so I said both confidently and politely, something like “There’s nothing to
feel sorry about. She is perfectly healthy and is lucky to know she has Celiac disease so she can eat the right
things and live a healthy life.”
There will be times when a parent is absolutely shocked by the insensitive things some people will say, right in
front of the Celiac child. Parents should be ready with a positive remark that will let people know that they feel the
opposite. Even if someone might agree inside, never let the child know that. Parents should talk to that person
afterwards, in private and explain to them why they don’t want their child hearing anything negative about CD. Even
thought it’s uncomfortable for everyone, have the conversations any way. The child is worth it. Parents should let
everyone in their life know that they want to keep things positive for the sake of the child. He or she will be on this
diet for the rest of his or her life, and parents need to start the child off on the right foot with everyone around
showing full support.
Positive people
Not everyone has a bad reaction though. Thankfully there are still sensitive and courteous people out there who
sense the need for positive talk and who see the importance of the diet. Sometimes parents will find people who
actually get it and want to understand it fully. They listen to the parent’s explanation and ask thoughtful questions.
Sometimes supporters who get the diet will call me with a food item to verify that it’s okay for my child to eat. I’ve
had a few Moms call me up and ask if certain things are G-F because they want to include everyone in the class
with the birthday treat they are bringing in. Parents: thank those supporters profusely for their kindness. Those
thoughtful people have brought tears to my eyes on more than a few occasions.
Examples of ways people have been, and still are, supporters in our lives:
• when I was first diagnosed in 2007, my Mom, siblings and their spouses all pitched in and got me a huge
surprise gift basket of G-F food items that they had all shopped for at Christmas.
• a group of women friends from church got together and also surprised me with a gift basket of G-F goodies
after diagnosis.
• my younger sister makes G-F sugar cookies every so often and invites my daughters over to frost and decorate
them for different holidays, and also keeps freezie pops and G-F treats at her house for Morgan.
• my older sister sometimes mails me G-F power bars and other G-F items she finds down south
• my sister-in-law makes chicken souvlaki as her meal for family parties instead of pizza, uses G-F pie crusts and
tries to make sure there is plenty for us to eat
• my mom makes us G-F meatballs and spaghetti on occasion. She keeps G-F crackers and snacks at her
house and makes sure she only gives us G-F candy. She makes G-F pie crusts for us, makes us special gravy
and tries to keep G-F rolls in the freezer to make garlic bread on occasion.
• my mother-in-law makes us this incredible stuffing for holiday meals, and G-F dips that we can all enjoy. She
makes sure there is a G-F cake or something for dessert, tries new recipes and keeps G-F snacks at her house
for sleepovers.
• my dad invites us over for G-F pancakes sometimes, and shows us how he uses a separate griddle, spatula,
etc. so we don't need to worry about cross-contamination. He surprises our girls by buying G-F treats like
Cheetos, Peeps, corn chips, etc.
• my elderly neighbor goes to a nearby specialty store and buys us G-F products to try a few times a year. She is
the one who introduced us to our favorite Chebe mixes.
• A thoughtful friend of mine always makes sure she brings something G-F for me whenever we meet up with
women from church at different get-togethers. She brings chocolate covered strawberries, has bought me
packages of G-F crackers to have with cheese, a box of Pamela’s lemon cookies, etc.
• A few friends from church pass on G-F recipes whenever they come across them in e-newsletters or in
magazines.
• A parent I met during my daughters’ preschool (who has since become a friend) made an incredible G-F cake
for the preschool’s graduation party, and has since made us G-F candied nuts and other treats. When she has a
party for her daughter, she lets us know that she has made G-F cupcakes so Morgan can have the same thing as
everyone else.
• A few moms have called to see what snack they can bring that is G-F for Morgan’s class
• My mother and mother-in-law (and sometimes other relatives) will make gluten-free cakes or cupcakes for us to
have at family parties. Or they always make sure there is ice cream and other frozen treats on hand.
• My husband’s grandma figured out how to make her cheesy potatoes without using soup or crushed cereal on
top, so that we may eat it too.
What parents can do:
Just as parents have a learning curve in understanding the gluten free diet, so will others. Parents should gently
reinforce the types of foods that are safe for their child. It is valuable to make copies of helpful material and provide
them to anyone who has the Celiac child in their care. Parents: always send some sort of gluten-free snack. If they
visit Grandma often, buy a box of Panda Puffs or other G-F cereal, a box of NutThin crackers, Cheetos, etc. and
keep them in her pantry for your child to enjoy when she visits. Print out a list of G-F snacks and tape it on the
inside of a cupboard door for Grandma to reference. Try not to have your child stay with anyone that belittles the
importance of your child staying on a strict gluten free diet, until they begin to understand the importance of
supporting your child’s health.
Parents should:
-Explain to supporters what they are going through, and let them know what they can do to help you.
-Start discussions with supporters about the importance for special food preparations.
-Never assume that a supporter knows what they are talking about when it comes to offending ingredients. Always
verify. (But also make sure you let them know that you really appreciate the efforts they are making and explain
your need to verify ingredients.)
Supporters: You can let the Celiac child and his/her family know how much you care by being positive (not
dismissive) about the gluten-free diet, by researching Celiac disease and its effects, by not treating the child as if
he/she is “sick”, by passing on to parents any helpful information you might find along the way, by splurging on a
G-F food that you just discovered for the child, by going over a recipe you want to try to make with the child’s parent,
by supporting them in a local walk or run, and just letting them know you are there if they need an ear or any other
help. Even by just letting them know you read this web page and that you are there for them as a supporter....it will
mean a lot to them.
he Celiac child’s immediate family, extended family and friends (whom I will call
“Supporters”) have a big role to play in the successful raising of a Celiac child. These
people need to put themselves into the shoes of a Celiac child and try to take a look at
this world of ours, in which gluten is a very big factor, and see what it’s like to be on a
gluten-free diet.
Parents need to discuss the importance of a positive attitude with everyone involved with
a Celiac child, right at the beginning of the whole transition into gluten-free living. This is
of utmost importance for a child. As a supporter, you ultimately want the Celiac child to
feel lucky to have been given the diagnosis, so that they will be a healthier person and
not have all the health problems that are associated with CD.
“Supporters”) have a big role to play in the successful raising of a Celiac child. These
people need to put themselves into the shoes of a Celiac child and try to take a look at
this world of ours, in which gluten is a very big factor, and see what it’s like to be on a
gluten-free diet.
Parents need to discuss the importance of a positive attitude with everyone involved with
a Celiac child, right at the beginning of the whole transition into gluten-free living. This is
of utmost importance for a child. As a supporter, you ultimately want the Celiac child to
feel lucky to have been given the diagnosis, so that they will be a healthier person and
not have all the health problems that are associated with CD.
Many thanks to
those who make
our lives easier
and tastier!
those who make
our lives easier
and tastier!
